TAKING OPPORTUNITIES

All the fun starts outside of your comfort zone.

In our everyday lives it's common to get caught up in a list of things we SHOULD do, which tends to be about a mile long. This can cause us to put off the things we really WANT to do like travel, skydive, perform live, write a book etc. because we tell ourselves we have many other things we have to get done, like a new project at work or school, walking the dog, cooking , the washing , but how about saying YES the next time an opportunity arises? The washing isn't going anywhere.

Here are some quotes I like about opportunity from quotegarden.com :

Jumping at several small opportunities may get us there more quickly than waiting for one big one to come along. ~Hugh Allen

A wise man will make more opportunities than he finds. ~Francis Bacon, Essays, 1625

Grasp your opportunities, no matter how poor your health; nothing is worse for your health than boredom. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966

Love and light

xo 

HOW TO BREAK THE HABIT OF COMPARING YOURSELF WITH OTHERS

"The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else's highlight reel."

If you always want what others have you'll never have enough.

Why do we compare ourselves to others? Well, simply put, the ego wants to be number one. However, the problem with comparison is we tend to compare our weaknesses against another's strengths or we compare ourselves to someone who has more expertise or experience in a certain area. This can leave us in a never-ending spiral of self destruction and unhappiness. We feel inferior because we feel like we should be entitled to have or to be able to do, all the things we admire/envy in others.  Even if we do well in the comparison we make with another, it's a short-lived boost of ego which is easily knocked down. Comparison is a losing game, but luckily, we get to make the rules. Here's some tips on how you can break this habit that doesn't serve you any good.

Breaking the habit of comparison...

Learn from a rivals positive points:

So, after hearing or seeing someone do something well you think you lack in some thing? Transform the jealousy into admiration and use this as motivation toward self improvement. It's easier to criticise people than compliment them, don't fall into this habit. Instead of trying to find a flaw in what they are doing in order to make you feel better about your own shortcomings, why not change those thoughts into that of inspiration ( I.e "If they can do it, so can I. Time to start working towards what I want!") You could even ask someone to teach you the skill they are good at, if that's not an option there's plenty of resources available to learn yourself in the form of Youtube videos, blogs etc.

Awareness:
Be aware of when you're slipping into comparison-mode, often we're so used to doing it that we don't even realise that we've slipped into it again. Be on a lookout for these thoughts, and when they creep up, pause, acknowledge the thought and gently change focus, "It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it."

Don't knock others down:
Sometimes we criticise others to try make ourselves feel better, this is just destructive and can form enemies where you could of formed a friend. It does you good to support others in their success, as a result they are more willing to help you and more interested in seeing what you can do. Remember, nobody has to lose for somebody to win. "It doesn't build you up to tear others down."

Be a better YOU:
Instead of comparing and competing with others you can always compare and compete with yourself.

 "Those who compete with others become bitter, those who compete with themselves become better."

You are the only person in the world you have the power to change and improve. So why not redirect the comparison? Ask yourself some questions: 

What are you doing now that you couldn't or didn't do a year ago?
What steps out of your comfort zone have you taken?
How further towards your goal/s are you now compared to 5 years ago?
How have you improved?
What negative behaviour/habits have you finally managed to stop engaging in?
Recently, what have you done that you thought you could never do?

Basically, how have you continued to become a better version of yourself?

This may work better instead of trying to stop comparing altogether, as that can be tricky to grasp hold of instantly due to the fact that the mind likes to figure out where we fit into the scheme of things.

Focus on your strengths:
Don't brag but feel good about them and work on using them to your advantage. Everyone has something they are good at, even if it's not the thing they most desire. Appreciate them, be grateful for them.

"Don't compare your chapter 1 with someone else's chapter 20."

Take note, that we only see the part of others they choose to share with us, they too have their own shortcomings and insecurities, there will be somebody they don't feel they measure up to when comparing themselves to another too. Don't be fooled into thinking their life is perfect, we are all fighting different battles. It's hard to judge a situation well that you are not a part of, so try to focus of the one thing you are in control of - yourself.


Love and light
xo.